ArchivedLogs:Doom the Grouch

Doom the Grouch
I'm gonna sing the 'Doom Song' now!
Dramatis Personae Doug, Micah
In Absentia	April 20, 2013 Doug and Micah text many texts.
Location Telecommunications!
(Doug->Micah): Holy crap, I didn't know who else to text. I just spoke to DOCTOR DOOM. Of Latveria. Like, the friggin' /leader/. He is scary as shit. (Doug->Micah): I might have to change my pants. (Micah->Doug): That...is. Fun? I hope? Good pants-changing, not bad? (Doug->Micah): Oh, no. I might have wet myself a little bit. SCARY. Didn't help that this science nerd girl was talking a mile a minute at him. I don't know how we avoided an international incident. (Doug->Micah): You totally need to come to this expo. The limb-replacement tech on display is off the chain awesome. (Micah->Doug): I had been planning on it at some point... Working pretty full time at the garage this weekend, though. Jake had one of the regulars call out on him. (Micah->Doug): How long is it supposed to be running again? (Doug->Micah): Boo. That's too bad. You would love this place. (Micah->Doug): So, you ended up cornering the leader of a small country with science talk? That could have been fun to watch... :) (Doug->Micah): No, this crazy chick cornered him. I think. He might have offered her a job. Or threatened to kill her. I'm not sure. (Micah->Doug): Threatened to employ her, maybe? ;) (Doug->Micah): Dunno. She goes to Jax's school, so I might tell him about it. Just in case. (Micah->Doug): Yeah, probably good to let someone know if minors are maybe being threatened... (Doug->Micah): Such is my thinking. I might pop down tomorrow and give him a heads up. :) (Micah->Doug): So helpful. :) Did the girl leave safely that you know of? (Doug->Micah): She disappeared into the crowd. Said she was going back to the school. Doom had already left, though, so I guess she did. (Micah->Doug): Probably okay, then. I do guess it would be hard for a man covered in clangy metal to stalk a girl through a crowd. (Doug->Micah): Hee. Indeed. He moves real slow, too. A person could probably outrun him. (Micah->Doug): I am trying /so hard/ not to put Doom Armour on an encumbrance table now... (Doug->Micah): It's like full Paladin plate mail, dude. If it wasn't mechanized, he wouldn't even be able to move, let alone carry a sword. (Micah->Doug): *_* Does he have a sword? (Doug->Micah): No. He has killer robots that play classical music. I'm pretty sure everything here is a secret Deadly thing, now. (Micah->Doug): That is not reassuring. After the last Big Public Event I went to. Murderdrones serving snacks. Attack of the Libertarian Golem and the Living YouTube Comments Section. Maybe it is for the best that I am crazy busy. XD (Doug->Micah): Oh, I think it's less deadly than that had the potential to be. But still deadly. You might be better off waiting for the Stark tour. (Micah->Doug): I'll just have to see what time has in store. Crazytech is still tempting tech. (Doug->Micah): Doom's tech would make Norman Osborn chew through a wall, I think. The robot band beats his murderdrone waiters to shit. (Micah->Doug): OHGOSH, I don't want to think of Osborn chewing through walls. I'm just... Imagining him crashing into rooms like the Kool-Aid Man now, and not one of the follow-up scenarios is causing me /not/ to cringe... WHY do you hate me, brain? (Doug->Micah): Hee. Just imagine it with him in boxers with hearts on them and sock-garters. That takes /all/ the scary out of it. (Micah->Doug): OHGOSH, no. No it does /not/. I am filled with horror now, Doug. HORROR. (Doug->Micah): Aw. I didn't mean to scare you. :( (Micah->Doug): I kid. Mostly... (Doug->Micah): Whew. :) Although, Osborn is a creepy mother. (Micah->Doug): No joke. He has all the creepytimes. (Doug->Micah): Yeeeah. (Micah->Doug): So, meeting Doom. More or less creepytimes than Osborn? (Doug->Micah): Not creepy. Intimidating as fuck. The man is a super-genius. On a par with Tony Stark or that Pym guy. (Micah->Doug): Also? Robot armour. XD (Doug->Micah): Something tells me he's just as intense out of the can. But, yeah. Robot armor with a big MEAN face on it. Didn't help. (Micah->Doug): Can...ohgosh. Now I am picturing Doom as Oscar the Grouch. Heeee... (Doug->Micah): Hah. You just made me laugh on the subway. (Doug->Micah): At least I have the bench to myself, now. (Micah->Doug): Good. Keep 'em wondering. It's the New York subway...they should be over little things like people /laughing/. (Doug->Micah): I was kidding. This car's not that full. :D But that Grouch thing WAS funny. (Micah->Doug): Yeeeeaaah, I'm a riot. ;) (Doug->Micah): You didn't meet him. XD That's not a terribly far-off simile. (Doug->Micah): He's even green! (Micah->Doug): Teehee! Does he love anything dirty or dingy or dusty? *_* (Doug->Micah): Yep. Anything rotten or ragged or rusty. (Micah->Doug): I am never allowed to meet this man now. I will just bust out laughing for /no apparent reason/. (Doug->Micah): Oh, gosh. Don't do that. He might CRUSH you. Or have one of his robots do it. D: (Micah->Doug): Ohnoes! Crushed like a soda can! Right into the trash with me. XD XD XD (Doug->Micah): Those robots were bad-ass. I wish I could see the program he wrote for them. Just for like, ten minutes. (Micah->Doug): No sneaking and peeking, Doug. You'll get soda-canned, too. Added to the Doom the Grouch Aluminum Collection. (Doug->Micah): Oh, hell no. I'm not /even/ going to try it. Something tells me that would be a bad idea. If not impossible in the first place. (Micah->Doug): Good boy. No superspy deathtech snooping for you. ;) (Doug->Micah): Oh, man. Do you know what I could do with AI tech just at the level his robots exhibit? I could /destroy/ the gaming field for years, and be richer than Solomon. (Micah->Doug): Probably best for the gaming industry that we don't let you at it, then. (Doug->Micah): *whine* Can't I destroy it just a little bit? (Micah->Doug): Because we like the gaming industry and want to see it grow big and strong like it should? ;) (Doug->Micah): I guess. But it still would be a little bit awesome. (Micah->Doug): Remember, Doug. You must use your powers for GOOD, as well as for awesome. XD (Doug->Micah): Pfft. What good are mutant polyglot powers if I can't use them to be rich? XD (Micah->Doug): GOOD coincides with rich. Sometimes. (Doug->Micah): I can only hope. All the rich guys I meet are kind of dicks, though. Most of them. (Micah->Doug): Yep. There's 'Money' from Cabaret stuck in my head for the foreseeable future. XD (Doug->Micah): I don't know that show. (Micah->Doug): <links YouTube video> (Doug->Micah, a few minutes later): Huh. I'll have to rent that. Is that...who is that chick? How old is this movie? (Micah->Doug): Liza Minelli? 1972. I know you're young, but classic is /classic/. Rent for sure. (Doug->Micah): HOLY CRAP. That's Liza Minelli? I thought she looked familiar. (Doug->Micah): Aaand Netflixed. (Micah->Doug): It is a little bit embarrassing how excited I am on your behalf... (Doug->Micah): Aw. I'll let you know how I like it. :) (Micah->Doug): Bonus! You will understand all of the German. Ha! :) (Doug->Micah): Augh. That's a blessing and a curse. I have to completely ignore the subtitles, and sometimes, the German is complete gibberish. (Doug->Micah): I finally gave up on subtitled anime. (Micah->Doug): Well...I mean...isn't it redundant for you, anyhow? (Doug->Micah): You'd be surprised how much early anime is unavailable /without/ subtitles. (Micah->Doug): WAITwaitwait. How strong is your power? Does Firefly Chinese make sense? Because...it's like its own language of horrifically mutilated Chinese... (Doug->Micah): Oh, Firefly is okay. It's like broken English. There's enough syntax that I can understand it, despite the jumble. (Doug->Micah): Ack. Phone's about to die. I'll call you later, okay? (Micah->Doug): Sure thing. Been good to hear from you. :) (Doug->Micah): Yeah. I've been a dick. Sorry about that. :( (Doug->Micah): Call you soon!