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Hi reader! I'm Doreen Green, though most people know me as, ah, Squirrel Girl. I'm nineteen, from Los Angeles... Well, Huntington Beach, specifically, but, well, most people know LA, so I just say that. And, um, been doing the superhero gig for four...five. Five years now. Yes, I call it superheroing. Because the word "vigilante" sounds all dark and broody, and that's, well, kinda ew.
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Oh! You wanna know about my history? COOL!
Dad was a military therapist for the Air Force. Duty, honor, loyalty, unending kindness, that kind of thing. Mom was working for the Winnick Family Children's Zoo at the LA Zoo as a zookeeper. Zoo. Zoooooo. I love that word. It's fun to say. Sorry, getting distracted! Anyway, they ran into each other at the Harriett Wieder park in the HB. Kinda literally, I hear; both jogging and not paying attention. Bam. Heads and hearts collided. I came around a year later, they got married about two after that.
The tail? Oh, yeah. I was born with it. Doctors offered to remove it, but my parents awesomely refused. Verrrry big on an individual's right to choose, my folks. Didn't mind having a "dirty mutie" as their daughter. But they always expected me to choose the right way to go. Good thing I turned out as good a kid as I did! They totes wouldn't appreciate if I started using a respirator and went to the "dark side" with the BrooHoo.
School, well. I did good enough. But it's boring, and I don't want to talk about it or the unfortunately misguided kids who used to think that bullying was okay. Though I will say that a desk full of squirrel poop is a great way to make it stop. Anyhoo.
I always liked those old cartoons about Earth-raised aliens fighting dinosaurs on the moon, and it seems like mutants should totes be able to do these kind of things! Amirite? So, at fourteen, I made my own costume and snuck out of the house to go hunt down villains for the first time. It was incredible! I arrested like two guys that night, both of whom were "slingin' the dope", as it were. It was -awesome-. Seriously! Even Dad had to bail me out and the city threatened legal action. But it was just so -cool-! After that, I figured I needed a mentor (so Dad wouldn't have to come talk to the LAPD again), so I tried to find a fellow heroic person to be a sidekick with. None were to be found, though, which made me kinda sad. Kids and their dreams. But, y'know. You move on.
Speaking of moving, I ended up doing just that soon after to upstate New York. Brooklyn, specifically. Dad got transferred to Mitchel, and Mom got a job at Prospect Park Zoo. Zoooo. I kept doing my thang, but then dad passed. It hurt, but I'd found and had been running with a group of fellow mutants after I kinda saved them from a rampaging mob of antimuties, and they were very comforting and supportive. Mom decided to head back to the HB to be with the rest of the fam, but let me continue my dreams out here. I wanted to go with her, but she told me she knew I'd do good here. I love my mom.
So, things got a bit hot for me and my crew out in the N to the Y to the C after a bit, so we went to somewhere colder. A lot colder. Milwaukee, Wisconsin, where even the snow has frostbite. Started helping people there. We pretty much rocked, doing charity drives and pulling people out of fires. I realized that I was holding them back, though, doing all the interviews and photo ops and most of the rescues and stuff, so I went solo in time to graduate high school. I'm sure they're doing fine now. We got a lot of good press out there, surprisingly!
Just moved back to the Big Apple to go to college this last fall. Not that it feels safe here, but it feels like I'm needed here. Like something's about to go down. I think my mom was really right, y'know?
Also, Monkey Joe here missed it.
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