ArchivedLogs:Taste Thoughts

Taste Thoughts
Dramatis Personae Heather and Paige	2017-03-05 "If it's people you may want to see a doctor. They have zombies out here you know."
Location <NYC> {Teamhaus} - Harbor Commons - Lower East Side
The right side opens up to a modern kitchen with cherry wood cabinets and steel countertops forming a corner against the close and right walls. This cooking area is fitted with modern appliances, among them being an over-the-counter microwave, a dishwasher, an electric stove, a refrigerator, and an oven. Opposite the kitchen is the dining room, accessed by a pair of narrow French doors. Walls of frosted glass panes, framed by stained wood and a diagonal slat slanting downwards towards the doors, separate the area from the rest of the unit. Long, vertical wooden boards stained dark comprise the rest of the walls in the unit. A small hallways leads from the entrance towards the back with a closet on the left and a bathroom on the right. Although the rest of the unit has beautiful hardwood flooring, the bathroom floor is tiled. It has the usual porcelain fixtures - a sink, a bathtub, a toilet - but also contains a separate shower stall made of steel and glass. On the left of the hallway is a closet containing a decent amount of storage space along with a washing machine and dryer. The hallway ends as it began, opening up into the same layout as the entrance, though flipped. To the right is the bedroom, concealed by the same frosted glass walls as the dining room with a single door of the same fashion as the walls. The left side holds a living room. Curtained windows along the back wall allow light to stream into the area. Though Spring is soon approaching, the winter weather seemingly felt the need to re-assert itself. Following days of relative warmth for the season, the temperature outside is just above freezing. Fortunately, Teamhaus proves to be well-insulated and has excellent heating. One resident of the unit, Paige, looks quite distressed as she sits on the floor of the closet with her back against the clothes dryer. Her head is bowed, her eyes are shut, and her hands are gripping her horns while her palms press against her temples. Despite the tension in her body posture, she is relatively silent - indeed, she only occassionaly lets loose muttered swears beneath her breath. Heather throws open the door to the closet, but it's clear but her raised eyebrows betray some surprise to find Paige in this room. She chirps with surprise and then again with concern. She disappears from the entrance, and then returns with her recorder. She sits down cross-legged in front of the closet and plays, "You are hiding in the closet. But we're not playing any hide and seek. Are you doing okay?" When the door to the closet opens, Paige's ears flick upwards and her eyes open, casting a sideways glance towards Heather. She doesn't say anything as her roommate speaks, but a smile plays lightly on her lips. "Hide and seek?" she asks in amusement. "No, I don't think we are." Her fingers splay along her horns before she releases them to press her hands into her forehead. "And, no, I don't think I'm okay. I keep having these ... thoughts." The young woman's brows furrow and her hesitation is fairly obvious. "I'm not supposed to -- the thoughts, they aren't -- I don't understand them. They're not -normal-, you know? They started a week ago, but I never had them -before- and they -- they don't make sense." "Not normal thoughts?" repeats Heather, "That don't make sense?" She rubs her own forehead lightly at that. "Are they giving you any trouble? Are the thoughts making you unhappy? What are the thoughts saying?" Her hands keep fidgeting a bit with the recorder in her hands, "Maybe that's too many questions. If you want to talk about your thoughts. We can talk about your thoughts." Letting her hands fall to her lap, Paige turns her head to study Heather as the other girl plays her recording. Although she bites her lip, the goat girl does not seem perturbed by the number of questions asked by her roommate. Once Heather's offer has been completed, her head drops again. "Trouble," she echoes. "I have -so- many thoughts that cause me trouble, that make me unhappy. But these are different. They won't leave me alone. They've been getting worse and worse, more insistent, more bothersome, more troubling. They're overwhelming. They're not -- not..." With a sigh, Paige trails off. "They tell me to -taste- things," she explains carefully. "They say, 'oh, you should taste that', 'you want to taste that', 'taste it', 'put it in your mouth and taste it'." "Your thoughts want you to taste things?" plays Heather as she leans forward to instead pull her knees in close. "Not people. If it's people you may want to see a doctor. They have zombies out here you know. It's something else. What are you wanting to taste?" "No! Not people!" Paige assures Heather with wide eyes in a rather aghast manner. "No! I don't -- I'm not a zombie! And things! You know, -things-. Like paper. What does paper taste like? Do different types of paper taste different? What about metal? There are so many kinds of metals, right? What do they taste like? What do they -all- taste like? Other things, too, but it's completely unhygienic! The whole -premise- is completely unhygienic. And gross. Why would I put those things in my mouth? Why does my brain keep telling me to? I don't understand. It doesn't make any fucking sense," the goat-girl concludes, sounding quite distressed though somewhat unconvinced. Heather records what Paige has to say and then, upon reviewing it, decides, "Taste is an important sense. Maybe it is part of your mutation. Maybe you have some kind of taste ability. And your body wants you to use it? Maybe it is your body that is talking in your mind." She shakes her head quickly and then says, "Nothing changed for me when time changed. Just the rest of the world changed. I don't know what it is like for my mind to change." "No doubt it's part of my mutation. I never had these thoughts before. I thought I was finished -- finished changing, you know? I thought the fur was the last of it, but no. It has to go after my mind too. I can't control what happens to my body - my mind is the only thing I have control over, you know? So I can't give in. I -can't-. These thoughts ... they're wrong, inhuman. I won't lose my humanity. I have all of my -other- senses through which to view and understand the world, you know? But tasting things? Licking them? That's just -gross-." Paige's jaw works while her face is red beneath the light covering of fur and her ears are pressed downwards. "And that would be the least impressive ability ever." Heather continues listening to Paige with a slightly tilted head. "Hm. That is not something I have experienced. I mean. I have had unwelcome thoughts. But nothing that told me to put things in my mouth." She nods a few times rapidly and says, "If you lose some control of your thoughts. We will find a way to work around it. We will find a solution. Do you know anyone who has thoughts like that? Taste thoughts?" Paige shakes her head, appearing further dismayed and her ears continue to angle in a downwards direction. "No. I don't know anyone else with these ... 'taste thoughts'. I mean..." The girl pauses for a moment as though in thought. "My friend Marinov said they sometimes have trouble with their instincts, you know, like felinoid stuff - stuff they didn't have before their mutation. But that's not the same, you know? I mean pica is a thing, right, I know that, but this is -- it's new. I've never had these urges before." She turns her head to look towards Heather again. "I don't know how to fix it. It's just in my head nearly all the time that I'm not thinking of something else. What ways are you thinking of?" "I don't know yet what ways I am thinking of," admits Heather, "I don't know if the thoughts can go away. Sometimes they'll stay around. But there are things that can help. Maybe people who can help. People who can help with thoughts." She gestures towards her own head for a moment. She chews on her own thumb for a few moment thoughtfully and adds, "We will figure it out." "What if we don't? What if we don't figure out a way? To deal with this. My health insurance is very basic. I don't think they'd cover psychologist or psychiatrist office visits because I have 'taste thoughts'. And I don't -- I don't know how long I can resist. I just don't know. Part of me want to just give in, you know? To make the thoughts stop. Just to make them -stop-." Paige closes her eyes, face still red. "Heather ... I'm scared." Heather stays still for a few moments and then plays, "No matter what happens I will be helping you. That is what we need to do. To take care of one another. I don't know anything about these thoughts. But there are others who can work with the mind who are not psychologists. My father could do things with the mind." Her jaw tenses momentarily and then she adds, "Can Hive do something? You know Hive. He could do things with minds." Paige nods silently at Heather's words as she listens to the recording, pulling her knees in towards her chest - they only reach approximately mid-way up due to their diminished length. "Thank you." It's said in a whisper, but then her voice rises to a more easily audible level. "Thank you. I don't know -- I don't know what I did to deserve you," the goat-girl remarks and then attempts to elaborate. "What I did to deserve -- deserve ... you know, your help." She spends a moment on thought before speaking again. "I wouldn't be surprised if Hive already knew. Not that I'd expect him to, you know? He just -- he just seems to know a lot about what goes on. But these are my thoughts. I'm sure he has much better things to do than relieve my screwed-up brain, you know?" "Maybe he has better things to do. Maybe he knows some better people to talk to. He seems to know many people and many things," says Heather with a bit of a shrug, "You are welcome for any help that I can give." She gets up to her feet and plays simply, "My legs are falling asleep. Got to stand. Do your legs not fall asleep?" Paige again nods at the other girl's recording. "And I will continue to give -you- whatever help I can. You make things seem ... less scary," the young horned woman remarks, gesturing with her hands. "You find solutions. All I ever seem to find are problems." This is said as she stands up herself. "They sometimes fall asleep. It depends on how I sit. I try to avoid putting pressure on them. Sleepy legs are crap at waking up. I will give Hive a try. Because you suggest it." "I find problems, too. You can't solve problems without finding them." Heather hits pause for a second and then nods a few times rapidly, "Yes. If that does not help. Then we will try another thing. And then keep trying things until something helps. Okay. I need to dry some clothes now."