Logs:Best Kind of Alone

Best Kind of Alone
Dramatis Personae Bug, DJ
In Absentia	2023-07-01 "Do you want me to know what you're thinking?"
Location <NYC> High Rock Park - Staten Island
For a place known for its tranquility, High Rock Park is a place buzzing with activity if you know where to look and listen for it for it. The low whistle of mourning doves, high tweets of Swainson's thrushes, and the chattering of house sparrows plays over the percussion of woodpeckers, lapping of waves pushed by the soft winds and the buzz of insects busying themselves. In the early summer, buds, berries and blossoms speckle a forestscape overwhelmed by the green of the trees and the browns of the earth. In such a place, one can find refuge from the cacophony of daily city life and find a place to not run across another human soul, though there are plenty of other souls to cross. For his part, Bug is taking advantage of the warmth of the day to take care of himself. Or more generally, himselves, as his hives find themselves spread out throughout the many corners of nature in the city. The faded grey of his worn sweater stands out with its lack of vibrancy, and his equally worn backpack tells of his preparation before coming out here. Jars clink among the other supplies he has brought, jostled as he makes his way to his destination with purpose. He whistles to himself, though it seems like his ability to do so is rather limited, just being the sound of air passing through some gaps in his teeth that barely passes over the buzzing emanating from his body. DJ's many selves make their own sort of constant buzzing, a constant background swarm that every once in a while it is good to have a break from. He's been seated on a log in a shady patch of woods, somewhere just set back from the more traversed path, sipping lemonade from a thermos, reading a Kindle, mind carefully shielded as instead he listening to the droning of the actual hive tucked into the tree just by him. His head turns at the sound of the not-really whistling, and a broad smile flashes across his face and then vanishes just as quick, replaced with one smaller, warm but reserved by the time Bug is actually in view. "Hey. It was -- Bug, right?" Bug's smile is broad, even though the one he is greeted with is less so. "Heya. Yeah, that's right, Bug. DJ, right? I remembered it like, DJ DJ, your DJ name." He points to his head to acknowledge his own great idea for the mnemonic. "I got some stuff I need to do in the area, and I saw you, so I wanted to come say hi! I can leave you alone if you want peace and quiet and stuff!" He shrugs one of the straps of his backpack off. "I know this place is real pretty, one of my favourites." "I remembered yours because -- bugs," DJ explains, warm amusement in his voice. "-- kinda sad, no matter how often people suggest it I have never grown much musical talent." He glances to Bug's backpack and then away, eyes lifting up to the trees overhead. "Mine, too. It's gorgeous. People diss Staten Island but getting away from the city while still in it -- Is it rude if I ask what some of your other favorite places are? I don't want to, like, hone in on your secret spots but you seem like you'd know some of the best places in the city to hang out with the trees when people are Too Much." A small flush pinkens his cheeks and he adds quickly: "I didn't mean -- you don't have to go. Sometimes being alone with company is nice, too." "Oh man, I know so many great secluded places! You could be a total hermit with all I know," says Bug proudly. He taps his nose and continues, "And I could even keep some of 'em secret still!" He slowly lowers himself down to sit further along the log, and then looks out towards the wood. "I like alone with company. It's my favourite kind of alone, and in the running for my favourite kinds of company. I like people, though, they are always interesting, if nothing else! You never know quite what's going on in there." He gestures around his head. DJ sounds almost startled in his quiet laugh, at this, his head shaking quick. "-- you know, I'm kind of a part-time telepath and I still never know what's going in --" He gestures, a mirror of Bug, toward his own head. "People always think it'll let you know people so much better but I feel like it just --" His brow furrows, head shaking, and he half-turns to look towards the nearby hive. "You kind of always have company, though, yeah?" "A part time telepath? Do you know what I'm thinking now?" says Bug, seeming delighted by this information, his grin wide. "A friend of mine is a full time telepath. I try and think more quiet sometimes, but I don't think I got an inside voice even inside me! But I bet people surprise even themselves sometimes, right?" He does not turn to look towards DJ, though there is something about his posture that suggests he is still doing so. "For me, yeah, it's like. I'm like a whole lotta dumb but well intentioned guys trying to figure out how do things. I wonder if it's hard, though, just being. Alone in there. I got myself always cheering me on!" "Do you want me to know what you're thinking?" Tentative and curious, the careful shields DJ has put up in his borrowed psionic awareness are cracking just a little. "-- I think it can be hard. I mean, before I ever had brain company, I thought it'd be creepy and weird to have -- like. A mental peanut gallery. But by now it feels weird not to. Like moving out to the country after being in a city a long time. Or like having a --" He doesn't finish where this thought is going, but the plastic fingers of his prosthetic hand twitch inward. He clamps his fingers down against his knee and gives Bug a crooked smile. "Do you ever not get along with yourselves?" "It'd be pretty cool if you could tell what I was thinking, but I'm not thinking the same thing anymore," says Bug. He holds out his hand, palm up, where a few of the red striped bugs land. "I get conflicted sometimes, like anyone else! Sometimes I can't decide, but there are parts of me that are already decided. I've stung myself before! But that's like when sometimes you decide to bite, and your tongue's got other plans." His lips press together as he pauses for a thought. "But sometimes, making decisions is hard." "For me the decisions get hard when I'm alone. I mean -- if there's only one of me there's nobody to check me if I'm deciding really bad. It's a lot of pressure." DJ pops the cap on his thermos restlessly. Closes it again, pops it again. "What are you thinking?" Bug finally frees the second strap from his shoulder and places the backpack on the ground. "Asking is sorta like mind-reading, if you think about it!" He puffs his cheeks out as he starts to fiddle with the zipper. "Lots of things. I'm thinking it's a nice day, I'm glad to be outside. I'm thinking..." The zipper slides a few inches open and closed a few times, a more neutral look falling over his face. "Do you ever feel like you're not doing enough? I'm like. All over the place. And I'm just kind of existing around." "Talking is like mind control. I mean, I'm pretty much just inserting the sound of my voice into your head and using it I could make you think of almost anything. A boat stranded up a mountain. Am invasion of fluffy aliens. A pileated woodpecker -- wait, no, that one's over there." DJ nods towards a bird scaling a pine tree nearby. He keeps watching the bird as he thinks about Bug's question. "I often think I'm not doing enough. The world needs a lot of fixing. Sometimes taking breaks feels like letting people down." He takes a swig of his lemonade and then looks back to Bug. "What more do you want to be doing? Guy -- guys like you, there's gonna be a lot of options." Bug giggles, "Maybe you're tricking me and now I am just imagining the woodpecker there! Though it looks more pileated than I'd imagine!" He kicks his feet a couple of time until his laughter fades, though a smile remains. "Mostly I want to look out for my family. Someone like a little cousin to me, she's looking for her friends, and I promised something maybe I shouldn't have. 'cause missing kids..." His brow tenses. "Sometimes they stay missing. I've been-- aw man, sorry that's probably sorta heavy! For a quiet woods time. I just mean, what I consider family is big and all over the place and I should be looking out, big and all over the place." "I'm not tricking you, that mind control comes straight from the bird. It made its --" DJ pauses, head tilting slightly to listen as the woodpecker again makes its high clear call. "-- see, it put itself into our brains." His expression shifts thoughtfully, and he turns more fully towards Bug. "-- Those Xavier's kids." It's not a question, just a sudden understanding, and even though he's already said he reads minds a pink flush is creeping up his cheeks as his head dips in apology. "We've been looking for them, too. Been big and all over the place, but so far -- nothing." He glances back to the hive. "... how far out are you looking?" "Wow, we're all some kinda telepaths, aren't we?" says Bug, grinning widely as he looks up at the woodpecker. "The rest of us just gotta learn to put our backs into it, I guess." Bug does not seem particularly surprised by DJ's confirmation, "I've been looking so super far out. States out. I have a couple of hives really dedicating their resources. I've got scouts hitching rides on vehicles to preserve their energy for the search, but so far I've had a pretty high loss rate on scouts with not a lot to show for it." He tosses up his hand in exasperation, and a couple of the red fuzzy bugs go flying off, while one clings to his sleeve. "I'm sorry about your --" A frown crosses DJ's expression as he looks at the bugs take wing. "... guys. Useful, though. I thought we had a lot of eyes but you all --" His fingers clench against his knee, and he sucks inward at his cheeks, chewing slowly at their insides. "This -- might be really. Forward, but if we -- could hitch a ride in some of your brains. At best might see something we're missing and at worst --" His smile is quick, here. Brighter. "It's the best kind of alone, right?" "Sometimes we gotta make sacrifices," says Bug about his lost scouts, "I try and hide real stealthy when I am out there though." His eyebrows raise at DJ's proposition, "The best kind of alone." His grin comes easy afterwards. "Sure, hop on, I got plenty of brain to go around!"