ArchivedLogs:Whats another name for 'pirate treasure'?

Whats another name for 'pirate treasure'?
Dramatis Personae Kurt, Aloke, Logan, Sophie, Kris, Megan
In Absentia	2013-05-16 '
Location Danger Room
The Danger Room. This level of the mansion, it's impossible to even access without a specific keycard, carried only by a few individuals at the school. Luckily for those assembled today, Kurt Wagner is one of those few individuals, having used his keycard to access the sub-sub-basement and its holographic training facility for the use of himself, his new friend Aloke, and a pair of the school's students. The theme of today's training: pirates. What purpose it serves in the 'real' world is up to the interpreter to decide, but here the room seems to have been converted to an endless expanse of sea, a pair of hulking galleons, the ridiculously oversized and overdone sort of ships most frequently seen in the sorts of movies that anyone with half an ear might have realized Kurt is quite fond of. They aren't at broadsides yet, but a little maneuvering could put them in this position easily. Each ship is manned with a skeleton crew of NPCs, and one of them, flying high the colours of a particular gentleman pirate, has an elf in the rigging. Kurt's face is all bright, toothy grin, as if he's enjoying himself far too much. His clothes have been swapped out for something more piratical, a blousey shirt and billowy pants and a rapier tied with a sash to his waist. His hair wasn't nearly this long about an hour ago but the Danger Room and supply anything, and this apparently includes a bandana he can tie across his skull to make his curly hair look a great deal longer than it is. The other ship is coming about, tacking against the wind, but making good speed. At the helm is Professor Suresh, or perhaps Captain Suresh in this circumstance. Somewhere he found one of those shirts that tie in the front, and he's gotten fully into character. No eyepatch though. Screw that thing. "Hoist the mainsail, and load the cannons, ye scurvy dogs!" Nevermind his ship is only sporting holographic sailors. That's hardly the point. The ship is being steered by one of those flickery types, and Suresh stands at the bow, hand up to shield his eyes from the sun, peering out across the waves to get a read on the situation. Megan Gwynn is at the bow of Kurt's ship, dressed in a pair of billowy pants and a striped shirt, with her hair done up in pig tails. She has a rapier belted at her waist, and she's grinning like an idiot. "This is so ridiculous!" she yells back over the work. "How is this even possible?" Sure, sure, they're supposed to be squaring off, but she's still marvelling at the technology! Holographic sailors know what to do with holographic ships! ... which is probably the only way it's fair to put *anyone* on campus up against Kurt in one of these sims. Kitty's dressed to match Kurt in style, but in her case the blousy shirt and billowy pants are a darker blue, bandanna and sash a paler. Definitely no eyepatch. Kitty herself is perched up in Professor Suresh's ship's crow's nest, taking one more scan for stray possessive forms -- er. For any unpleasant surprises the scenario might have in store for one or both ships. Other ships. The British. The Kraken. "All clear so far, Captain," she calls down, her voice thinned by distance and wind. "'Cept for the Dread Pirate Wagner!" "Question the magic, liebchen, and you risk it becoming less magical." Kurt calls down to Megan, his voice amused. His tail flicks back and forth, stirring the sail behind him as the wind billows it out. "I am certain if you watch enough Star Trek there is a technical explanation in there somewhere." He looks up towards the ship fleeing in front of his own, and his fang show in a sudden grin. Despite how many times he's argued against having any sort of animalistic nature, there's something heavily evocative of a new world monkey in the way he begins to bound down from the space between the royal and the topgallant sails, zipping along the ropes at breakneck speed. It's almost unfair how fast he moves in the rigging, and how utterly unconcerned about his safety while doing it. When he starts to bark orders to the crew, his voice has adopted a rough sort of cannoning roar that is unfamiliar given how he usually speaks. "Hard to port and come about, ready for broadsides! Ready starboard batteries! Stations! Miss Gwynn, how close are we to engagement?" Two tall ships race through the open ocean under clear skies. Captain Suresh is perched on the bow of one ship, while Captain Bluetail races through the rigging of the other at breakneck pace. Suresh is now trying to bring his crew to heel. "They're coming about! Load the port long guns!" Sure, the holographic crew handles all those bits, but its still fun to shout it. Sophie! Kris! Report your status!" Aloke tele-flashes back and forth across the decking to make sure everything is in order, and then meets in the middle to hear from his live crew members. "Wha?" Megan asks, confused by Kurt's request. Then she gets it. "Oh!" And up she flies, zipping to the top of the mast to alight in the crow's nest. "Looks like they're coming to our um ... right? Starboard?" she calls to him. "They'll be in range in about two minutes. I think they're loading canons!" Meanwhile, Kris, clad in classic pirate wench attire is hanging from some rigging. This kind of fighting seems oddly comfortable to her. Hitting the deck barefoot with a holographic parrot on her shoulder, she's loaded for bear. A brace of flint and wheel-lock pistols criss-cross her chest, while a pair of shorts hang from her sheath,"I'm ready to board captain! Mad Kris the Kracker! When they close in, I say we fire grapples, sweep the decks with grape-shot, and then finish off the remaining crew!" And then, because she's decided this is supposed to be funny,"Captain, shall we release the war-monkeys and battle-parrots!?" Sophie is absolutely impractically-dressed, even for a pirate; snug pants, leather boots with the folded-over tops, and one of those long, overly-fancy coats in a sort of rust-red. Her hair is tied back in a braid, at least, to keep from getting all over the place, and a purply-red bandanna covers her head. She is armed with a musket, with a cutlass at her waist. "Hoist the mainsails, Cap'n!" That means something, right? "We'll let Mad Kris lead the fray, and then plunder anyone unlucky enough to be left alive!" There's a rushed vvvvvvvp sound as Kurt slides the rest of the way down to the deck on one of the ropes leading to the mainsail of the mast he had been on the top of. He hits the deck with a tmp! of bare feet, already jogging his way towards the bowsprit. True to nature, he clambers right to the end of that, tail curled around it to balance as he watches his ship wheel about to come up against Aloke's ship at range. "Secure the main and the mizzen, let free the fore! Longs ready the chain shot! To arms, to arms!" Who knew Nightcrawler could BELLOW so effectively? Logan, appearing on the deck from below, dressed in a pirate's garb (complete with eye patch) heads toward Kurt and stands heroically there amidships... for about 3.6 seconds. "You seriously expect me to go OUT in this shit?" he asks Kurt with a motion toward his attire. He has a smoldering cigar in his mouth. "I look like the mascot of a kids' program. I dunno why I let you talk me into this, bub." Scowling - or pouting - Logan (AKA 'Patch') scans around himself and inhales deeply through his nostrils. "Ya know gunpowder STINKS, right? An' who said YOU get to be the Captain, Elf?" "Make to outpace them, helmsman!" Aloke shouts at his holographic crew, assuming the computer can have them do that much. "You'll have your boarding opportunity in no time, ladies... I'll be right back." Aloke draws the long knife from its sheath at his belt and squints out across the water. In a flash he's gone, and a quick succession of flashes can be seen high up in the rigging of Kurt's ship. Aloke is back on the deck of his own ship even before the Bluetail's sails and rigging are starting to slump, half of the top ropes sliced. Megan winces at the flash of light that signals Aloke's teleportation. But she's the only one in position to notice it, on Kurt's ship. For several moments she can't figure out what's happened. Then the sails slump, and she squeaks, "Captain, Captain! He cut our sails! We're floundering!" She means foundering, but she's still wrong. "Two can totally play at this game. I'll be right back!" She calls, then zips up into the air, flying fast and high over towards the other ship. When she's near, she flaps her wings, sending a mass of pinkish-glowy dust towards the ship. Some of it will probably be carried on the wind; some will likely mis sentirely! But if she's lucky (because she's sure not got the aim down, yet) maybe some of his crew will be incapacitated. Kris sees Megan coming. Oh yep. She draws a pair of pistols off her chest brace and fires off a shot from each. They only fire fake ammunition of course. Constructs of light that 'poit' red blotches of light on whatever they hit to mark whatever real material she might tag. Whether or not she gets anywhere near the Pixie (these old pistols were notoriously inaccurate at ANY distance), she goes scurrying below decks. Why? To put some long boots on! She can't wade through pixie dust barefoot,"Cap'n, goin' to get some protective gear on! I mean, boots!" The presence of /pixies/ makes this whole situation a bit bizarrely Peter Pannish. BUT NO MATTER. When Sophie sees Kris aiming upwards, she lifts her own gun to fire at whatever it is kris is aiming at-- oh, hi Megan. Oh, BYE Megan??? They have the same ammunition as Kris's, and muskets aren't terribly accurate themselves, especially at long ranges. When Kris heads down to get boots, Sophie trundles up towards Aloke. "Captain!" She points to the other ship. "How long 'til we gangway and board the filthy scallywags?" Whether this actually makes sense as a question is anyone's guess. "Nae, Miss Gwynn, we still float, we are only somewhat becalmed. Riggers, secure those sails!" The holographic crew scramble to get the ropes caught and re-tied, a poor substitute for whole rope but a substitute nonetheless. Kurt remains perched on the bowsprit, glancing over his shoulder to Logan with a grin. "You can be captain when you make this look as good as I do. As long as you complain...you are first mate! You will need to direct the second volley. FIRST VOLLEY, AT THEIR MAIN!" The cannons erupt with fire, and small holographic cannonballs connected by chains whipping through the air. They pass through anyone who is actual flesh and blood harmlessly, but tear into the ship itself, ripping at the masts and--more importantly--the sails as they go. Cut ropes are one thing. Sails with enormous holes in them are quite another. "First mate, the ship is yours, I shall be back anon!" Nightcrawler vanishes then in a cloud of smoke, the rude cough of his brimstone lost in the cannon fire. Where the answering bamf of his reappearance is almost invisible--unless someone is looking low on the stern of Aloke's ship, just above the waterline.... *Grrrrrrowl.* Logan just lets that speak for itself, for a bit. Then he makes as much of a show as he can, directing the second volley of cannons, only to-- "Hey!" he bellows after Kurt. "Give the BOAT to an A.I. and lemme in on the FUN! Stupid Elf..." Grumbling away, Logan realises that the crew manning the cannons for their next volley are all looking at him for orders... "Uhhh... Whatever HE said--" and he pulls his cigar from his mouth. "Uhh, come about! Ready the... big black guns! 'N... fuck. I mean, FORE!!!" The crew stare dumbly at the Wolverine who resists the urge to 'put face in palm'. "You know what I mean! (Who programmed these guys???) Fire! (Whoever hits the Elf gets a free beer on me, after the show)." Then Logan stalks to the prow of the ship and scowls. Aloke was about to give Sophie a more positive answer, but then his own sails get shot out around them. It was meant to be a sprint around their bow, but that sure isn't happening now. Then he looks up to see the pixie letting loose with her glittering dust. He doesn't /know/ what it does, but he's got a decent gut instinct about not finding out like this. He shouts quick orders to keep the guns firing and then flashes to the port side of his ship. He snatches up that side's smoldering slow match, "You won't be needing this..." he mutters, and disappears again. After being gone for just a moment, he reappears on the poop deck, nearly all the way stern, looking more than a little smug. Good thing there's no blue furry elf lurking Right Behind Him at the water line. Meanwhile, below decks on the Bluetail, an errant slow match falls, accelerating at a rate of 9.8 meters per second squared, towards a goodly portion of their black power. Sure it'll just blow a hole in the side, and not sink the ship, but at least they won't have much left to be shooting at them with. They'll have to board for sure! Which is handy, because The Lightfoot is dead in the water. Red streakie paintbolts! Even inaccurate, /three at once/ is enough to freak Megan out, and she holts her wings entirely and drops like a /stone/ towards the water, shrieking and spewing dust in all directions as she falls. A single red paint drop pegs her on the lower left wing. Moments before she would hit the water, Pixie spreads her wings again, and then skims along the surface--using only three wings. She comes back up on the far side of the ship, her blade drawn, then zips in towards Kris from behind. "Have at thee, wench!" she declares, performing an aerial lunge that looks graceful, beautiful, and utterly ineffective. So, Kris doesn't want to be a jerk. This kind of 'fitin' is no fun if you don't make it graceful. Rather than dodge the utterly ineffective blow or smack it aside contemptuously, she draws both of her blades at once and faces off against the girl, dodging the lunge by the narrowest margin she can manage. "Huzzah!" Then she's weaving her swords in a completely useless, but otherwise pleasantly showy display. There's a flip, and some sort of odd cart-wheel like move that includes a slash at the Megan's blade. SOMEHOW, she makes it look like Megan's lunge has disarmed her as her own swords go sailing across the deck. She is, in effect, a show-off type today. Then she decides to finish by doing what pirates do. She draws a pistol, and fires at Megan point blank,"Ye should know better than to fight fair with a pirate, lass!" Oh crap, that wasn't supposed to happen. Sophie looks up at the sails being pretty much demolished, her face making a D: sort of expression. "Uh-- avast!!" is all she can manage. Whirling around at the sound of Megan's voice, she points her gun in that general direction but sees that Kris has things under control. And so with nothing else to do for the moment, while the two ships are still too far apart for boarding, Sophie finds herself a sheltered spot and just sits herself down and, to all outward appearances, has herself a nap. The Bluetail, in the meantime, gains itself a new crew member in the form of-- well, Sophie. Though one slightly less corporeal. She walks up behind Logan, literally silently (there's no actual substance there to /make/ any sound, after all) and all but shouts -- in an attempt to startle the Wolverine -- "You think you can beat us with this kind of strategy?!" The Lightfoot may have had her sails ruined, but she should still have enough momentum to be moving forward at a decent clip--and thus, still steerable. This is advantageous over the Bluetail's situation, with an enormous hole in her side which prevents her from banking too hard to the side with the tear in it. That is...except that the ship continues to shudder even when not under bombardment, as if something is slamming into an essential part of the ship over and over again. The sound of thunder rapports...and then there is a wretched snapping sound, and the Lightfoot lurches to one side and then the other. "CAPTAIN SURESH." Kurt bellows, from the back area of the Lightfoot, and those who look might see him floating on a solid-looking piece of wood, which was undoubtedly previously attached to the Lightfoot. "I SEE YOU HAVE PUT A HOLE IN MY SHIP. I THINK I SHALL PATCH IT WITH YOUR RUDDER, WHAT DO YOU THINK?" Kurt gives a little wave, and then he disappears from the free-floating rudder, reappearing on the rail of the ship he left Logan on. He turns to Wolverine with a rather scandalized expression on his face. "You let them put a giant hole in it! I leave you with a ship for /two minutes/ and you let them put a giant hole in it! What kind of pirate are you?" Louder, clearly meaning for the crew, "AROUND SLOW, PREPARE TO BOARD! WE HAVE A MAIDEN TO SAVE, BOYS!" *SNIKT!* "Tell it to the claws, Bub!" Logan calls after the barb-tailed little... yeah well, there IS a big hole in the ship. He spins about, throws off his jacket and snarls at the crew. "C'mon, hurry up - I haven't got all day, uhh... grappling hooks! Gimme grappling hooks! Rest o' you... sea-faring... fuckin' hell I sound like a moron..." his voice trails off as he goes from yelling at the crew to scratching the back of his neck with his de-clawed hand, an eyebrow cocked at the other ship. "Just... get me in close so I can skuttle the tugboat and get back to the game!" He casts a sharp glance at Kurt when the first ropes fly over the side. "All he needs now is a penis-guard and a pair o' tights an' we got 'Shakespeare at Sea'..." "Why you...!" Aloke is actually speechless with in-pirate-character rage, shaking his fist at his drifting rudder, and then the far away ship. "You can't just- " he splutters. Pulling himself together, he spies Sophie haunting the Bluetail and he shouts, "Can you possess him, or something?" Then the Bluetail's rope-n-hooks are sinking into the Lightfoot's banisters. He kicks one off, but they're coming too fast. "Alright Kris, you get your wish! Open fire!" Then he's off again in a flash light, reappearing /right/ in front of Kurt, trying to 'blind' him briefly, to give him time to get the teleporter into grappler's hold. (portie-fight!) ((And, um, good luck wrestling a /circus performer/ Aloke)) One problem. You see, Kris just shot Megan at point blank, and at that range, it's impossible to miss even with the terrible pirate weapons. On the other hand, Megan is incredibly easily startled, and the startlement of being shot as well as the sudden pain that comes with having a paintball welt her in the right abdomen earns her most immensely startled response! Megan shrieks as she falls to the deck, and a plume of dust flies from her body nearly ten cubic meters in size rushes towards Kris. Also at point blank. This is where things get a bit weird. When she gets dust-puffed in the face, Kris shudders, and then giggles. She's got one of THOSE looks on her face. See, if her My Little Pony obsession is any indication, Kris LOVES unicorns. So when a daring 'alicorn' floats down from above to alight before her, Kris' eyes are wide. The queen of the unicorns addresses her: "My child! Our realm is in trouble!" From afar, Kris can be seen bowing in place to a barrel of cod preserves, fist across her chest,"My queen." In Kris-land, the Alicorn declaims her dangerous quest,"Kris, you are our savior! You must save all the unicorns of Equestria from the Evil King Sombra!" A smaller, tiny pink pony appears before her and says in a raspy, dark voice,"YOU KNOW WHAT YOU MUST DO!" The tiny pony points a paw at Aloke's direction. A lot of this would make more sense if anybody but Kris could see the unicorns. As it is, the only warning Aloke gets is Kris whirling in place, drooling slightly. Then blue light flickers around her hand, and a flintlock pistols appears in it. She fires the lightblots at the man. And then, like she tends to do when firing a gun, it flickers and is already reloaded. In this manner, she fires again. And again. And again. Almost as fast as she can pull the trigger,"I shall destroy you, King Sombra, for the honor of Equestria!" Pixie dust. Because far away or not, that's a lot of 'lead' filling the air at Aloke. Sophie's body jerks back awake after her cameo appearance on the rival ship, and while she does push herself to her feet immediately, she staggers a bit to get her footing. -- It doesn't help that suddenly the boat is bobbing back and forth rather a bit more than it had been before. "What the--?" But, no matter. Sea legs recover after a moment, and -- Kris is not looking very good over there. "Kris--?" It isn't loud enough for the other girl to hear, just yet, but when /shots/ start being fired, that's when she starts to /run/ to the other side of the ship. "KRIS!" Assuming she isn't shot at, too, she dives for the girl's legs in an attempt to knock her down. She actually looks a little genuinely frightened about the whole situation. "Snap out of it!" In part, Aloke's ploy works. after all, Kurt's eyes aren't any more resilient than any other man's, and a bright flash of light directly in them does serve to dazzle him. His hand comes up as if to protect those same eyes, and in that moment Aloke can make contact with the elf. Of course, then Nightcrawler smiles, and this might be Captain Suresh's first idea that things might be about to go a bit pear-shaped. "Oh, mein Freund--" They bamf the minute the contact is secured. It's only a few feet to the side, but the experience is likely thoroughly disorienting for Aloke. The brimstone dimension--well, it smells like it sounds like it would smell, and it has no sense of gravity, instead a freewheeling sense of falling at terminal velocity. Then they're in the real world, and Kurt is still speaking. "--I am afraid--" BAMF! "--that this is not--" BAMF! "--a wise course of action--" "--for the uninitiated. I hope you can swim!" The final teleport has the pair reappearing over the water between the ships, and Kurt lets go of Aloke, who by now is most likely quite dizzy and maybe a bit nauseous. The elf disappears to reappear on one of the mizzenmast spars of his own ship, just to draw his sword and roar at what's left of his crew--Logan and hologram alike--while gesturing towards the Lightfoot with his rapier. No, that's a sabre, come to look at it. "THE WASTRELS ARE OURS, WE OFFER NO QUARTER!" Logan blinks. "Elf?" Stalking back to the far side of the ship, he reaches out for one of the ropes holding some heavy barrels and sand-bags up off the main deck. "Fuckin' teleporters..." he mutters for the holograms to hear. "I'm comin' over!" he yells over his shoulder, then he grasps the rope, winds it around his hand and slashes it below his grip with his other claws-- --nothing happens. Logan looks upward at the barrels and sandbags, cocks an eyebrow, and then glances down at himself and the rope in his grasp. "What happened to sailin' through the air like a fucking pirate?" he demands of the atmosphere, and the creaking under his heels gives the answer away. "Aww, this sucks--" he lets go of the rope, which whips past his face, severing his cigar in twain and causes the sandbags and barrels to fall rather suddenly (with no counterweight) to the main deck... Logan takes one look across the ocean between the two vessels and lifts his un-clawed hand to his mouth: "I ain' SWIMMIN' across, Elf!" he bellows. "That was my last cigar..." so he takes a running leap instead. If he weren't so dizzy... nauseous... he could just... find a horizon. Spinning blue, everywhere. Aloke just plummets. Kurt was smart. Aloke can get out of a lot of jams, but he has to /focus/ himself to become the light, and now he can't. Aloke falls straight down to the water, the smoke of Kurt's teleporter plane contrailing behind and above him until he finally splashes down into the water. Now /that/ is enough to focus him. How can it feel so real?! "SON OF A LAKSHMI YOU BLUE BASTARD." Aloke is sort of laughing while spluttering holographic water out of his nose and mouth and finally clears enough of himself out of the water to blink himself back to the deck of the Lightfoot. Just in time to realize Logan is sailing right toward him. Megan's dusty cloud grows, and by now Pixie's in her own little world. A little bit of pain, a lot of fuzzy teddy bears. "So cute," she mumbles to herself, cuddling up on the deck with the stuffed animals only she can see as her dust continues to spread. She fires that unending stream of 'lead' at Aloke until Sophie tackles her. At first, Kris begins to sit up, her flintlock flickering to a sword in her hand... Then she really focuses on what's going on. "YOU." Looking at Sophie, her eyes are completely alight with adoration. Because of what she sees in her own magic Pixie Dust world,"Prince Blueblood! My love! Kiss me!" Her voice is breathy as she leans forward, to run a hand over 'Prince Blueblood's mane lovingly... Thankfully, Sophie is saved from an even more awkward moment when Kris turns away a moment later,"No, wait, there is no time! Equestria must be saved! You've come just when I needed you! The path is arduous! I am afraid my fore-hooves are not working right. Evil King Sombra has transformed me into an apish monstrosity!" She points at the other ship with her sword, and commands,"Prince Blueblood, my love! FORWARD!" In Kris's mind's eye, Prince Blueblood (AKA Sophie) helps her to her 'hooves', and they take off charging through the sky across a vast rocky landscape towards an evil castle full of dark minions. Cue reality, where Kris is sort of just flopping around on the deck like a fish having a seizure. This is, apparently, how one flies when one is high on Pixie Dust. Wait... is she saying 'woooooooooosh'? Yes. She's saying 'woosh'. In her rush to save Aloke from what she thought was certain, actual doom, Sophie may have forgotten about the whole. Pixie dust. Issue. Once she gets Kris to the floor, if only temporarily, that's when she starts to sort of lose it a little herself. "What-- oh jeez," are her last conscious words before she just sort of curls up on the floor where she is, giggling quietly and hugging her arms against herself. "/There/ you are," she adds, cuddling up against the floor of the ship. "I've been looking for you..!" And there she grins widely, giggling again and otherwise becoming a casualty of the brutal Hell that is pirate war. Slowly, Kurt's sword arm drops as he watches the pixie dust subsume the deck of the other ship. His tail twitches back and forth. "I'll just...stay here with the boat, then? Ja. I think this is the best course of action. Riiiiight here, staying right here." "OUTTA MY FUCKING--" Logan flails his arms about to keep himself from crushing (or worse, 'slice & dice'ing) Aloke, and is only partly successful. His grizzled, grumpy form soars like a cat who just realises he is about to land in the dog's waterbowl, his claws raking across the air on an angle that would leave Aloke beside himself, twice over. Then everything stops. Well, Logan stops. He frowns. He blinks. He glares. "What the--?" The man is suspended in mid-air, some feet above the upper deck of the other ship, on a collision-course with Aloke... but not moving. "Safety Protocols Error 16," says the Danger Room's computer in a detached, feminine voice. "Cannot compensate for adamantium laceration capability. Attack would result in Test Subject Aloke's de-resolution." Logan BRISTLES. "Put. Me. DOWN!" "Complying," the Danger Room responds - and drops Logan directly to the deck. *CRASH* Then the lower deck. *CRASH* From somewhere inside the ship, Logan can be heard cursing and muttering. "This is so unfair..." *SNIKT!* *SLASH!* *CREAK!* "Aww, shit..." Aloke's eyes go huge as he barely takes in Logan's approach. The computer's catch gives him the half-second to flash to one side (now, unnecessary) but it was also too late to avoid his gasp, the sharp intake of breath laden with fairy dust. Suddenly Aloke's pupils dilate so far the glow in his eyes is more like headlights shining out of his face. He just topples over backwards, eyes STARING straight ahead, as he reaches up into the nothing in front him, mumbling something about the angels. Aloke - out for the count. Very quietly, from across the Danger Room on his now-empty boat which has begun to list, Kurt calls, "Does this mean I win?"