ArchivedLogs:Doom the Grouch

Doom the Grouch
I'm gonna sing the 'Doom Song' now!
Dramatis Personae Doug, Micah	April 20, 2013 Doug and Micah text many texts.
Location Telecommunications!
(Doug->Micah): Holy crap, I didn't know who else to text. I just spoke to DOCTOR DOOM. Of Latveria. Like, the friggin' /leader/. He is scary as shit. (Doug->Micah): I might have to change my pants. (Micah->Doug): That...is. Fun? I hope? Good pants-changing, not bad? (Doug->Micah): Oh, no. I might have wet myself a little bit. SCARY. Didn't help that this science nerd girl was talking a mile a minute at him. I don't know how we avoided an international incident. (Doug->Micah): You totally need to come to this expo. The limb-replacement tech on display is off the chain awesome. (Micah->Doug): I had been planning on it at some point... Working pretty full time at the garage this weekend, though. Jake had one of the regulars call out on him. (Micah->Doug): How long is it supposed to be running again? (Doug->Micah): Boo. That's too bad. You would love this place. (Micah->Doug): So, you ended up cornering the leader of a small country with science talk? That could have been fun to watch... :) (Doug->Micah): No, this crazy chick cornered him. I think. He might have offered her a job. Or threatened to kill her. I'm not sure. (Micah->Doug): Threatened to employ her, maybe? ;) (Doug->Micah): Dunno. She goes to Jax's school, so I might tell him about it. Just in case. (Micah->Doug): Yeah, probably good to let someone know if minors are maybe being threatened... (Doug->Micah): Such is my thinking. I might pop down tomorrow and give him a heads up. :) (Micah->Doug): So helpful. :) Did the girl leave safely that you know of? (Doug->Micah): She disappeared into the crowd. Said she was going back to the school. Doom had already left, though, so I guess she did. (Micah->Doug): Probably okay, then. I do guess it would be hard for a man covered in clangy metal to stalk a girl through a crowd. (Doug->Micah): Hee. Indeed. He moves real slow, too. A person could probably outrun him. (Micah->Doug): I am trying /so hard/ not to put Doom Armour on an encumbrance table now... (Doug->Micah): It's like full Paladin plate mail, dude. If it wasn't mechanized, he wouldn't even be able to move, let alone carry a sword. (Micah->Doug): *_* Does he have a sword? (Doug->Micah): No. He has killer robots that play classical music. I'm pretty sure everything here is a secret Deadly thing, now. (Micah->Doug): That is not reassuring. After the last Big Public Event I went to. Murderdrones serving snacks. Attack of the Libertarian Golem and the Living YouTube Comments Section. Maybe it is for the best that I am crazy busy. XD (Doug->Micah): Oh, I think it's less deadly than that had the potential to be. But still deadly. You might be better off waiting for the Stark tour. (Micah->Doug): I'll just have to see what time has in store. Crazytech is still tempting tech. (Doug->Micah): Doom's tech would make Norman Osborn chew through a wall, I think. The robot band beats his murderdrone waiters to shit. (Micah->Doug): OHGOSH, I don't want to think of Osborn chewing through walls. I'm just... Imagining him crashing into rooms like the Kool-Aid Man now, and not one of the follow-up scenarios is causing me /not/ to cringe... WHY do you hate me, brain? (Doug->Micah): Hee. Just imagine it with him in boxers with hearts on them and sock-garters. That takes /all/ the scary out of it. (Micah->Doug): OHGOSH, no. No it does /not/. I am filled with horror now, Doug. HORROR. (Doug->Micah): Aw. I didn't mean to scare you. :( (Micah->Doug): I kid. Mostly... (Doug->Micah): Whew. :) Although, Osborn is a creepy mother. (Micah->Doug): No joke. He has all the creepytimes. (Doug->Micah): Yeeeah. (Micah->Doug): So, meeting Doom. More or less creepytimes than Osborn? (Doug->Micah): Not creepy. Intimidating as fuck. The man is a super-genius. On a par with Tony Stark or that Pym guy. (Micah->Doug): Also? Robot armour. XD (Doug->Micah): Something tells me he's just as intense out of the can. But, yeah. Robot armor with a big MEAN face on it. Didn't help. (Micah->Doug): Can...ohgosh. Now I am picturing Doom as Oscar the Grouch. Heeee... (Doug->Micah): Hah. You just made me laugh on the subway. (Doug->Micah): At least I have the bench to myself, now. (Micah->Doug): Good. Keep 'em wondering. It's the New York subway...they should be over little things like people /laughing/. (Doug->Micah): I was kidding. This car's not that full. :D But that Grouch thing WAS funny. (Micah->Doug): Yeeeeaaah, I'm a riot. ;) (Doug->Micah): You didn't meet him. XD That's not a terribly far-off simile. (Doug->Micah): He's even green! (Micah->Doug): Teehee! Does he love anything dirty or dingy or dusty? *_* (Doug->Micah): Yep. Anything rotten or ragged or rusty. (Micah->Doug): I am never allowed to meet this man now. I will just bust out laughing for /no apparent reason/. (Doug->Micah): Oh, gosh. Don't do that. He might CRUSH you. Or have one of his robots do it. D: (Micah->Doug): Ohnoes! Crushed like a soda can! Right into the trash with me. XD XD XD (Doug->Micah): Those robots were bad-ass. I wish I could see the program he wrote for them. Just for like, ten minutes. (Micah->Doug): No sneaking and peeking, Doug. You'll get soda-canned, too. Added to the Doom the Grouch Aluminum Collection. (Doug->Micah): Oh, hell no. I'm not /even/ going to try it. Something tells me that would be a bad idea. If not impossible in the first place. (Micah->Doug): Good boy. No superspy deathtech snooping for you. ;) (Doug->Micah): Oh, man. Do you know what I could do with AI tech just at the level his robots exhibit? I could /destroy/ the gaming field for years, and be richer than Solomon. (Micah->Doug): Probably best for the gaming industry that we don't let you at it, then. (Doug->Micah): *whine* Can't I destroy it just a little bit? (Micah->Doug): Because we like the gaming industry and want to see it grow big and strong like it should? ;) (Doug->Micah): I guess. But it still would be a little bit awesome. (Micah->Doug): Remember, Doug. You must use your powers for GOOD, as well as for awesome. XD (Doug->Micah): Pfft. What good are mutant polyglot powers if I can't use them to be rich? XD (Micah->Doug): GOOD coincides with rich. Sometimes. (Doug->Micah): I can only hope. All the rich guys I meet are kind of dicks, though. Most of them. (Micah->Doug): Yep. There's 'Money' from Cabaret stuck in my head for the foreseeable future. XD (Doug->Micah): I don't know that show. (Micah->Doug): <links YouTube video> (Doug->Micah, a few minutes later): Huh. I'll have to rent that. Is that...who is that chick? How old is this movie? (Micah->Doug): Liza Minelli? 1972. I know you're young, but classic is /classic/. Rent for sure. (Doug->Micah): HOLY CRAP. That's Liza Minelli? I thought she looked familiar. (Doug->Micah): Aaand Netflixed. (Micah->Doug): It is a little bit embarrassing how excited I am on your behalf... (Doug->Micah): Aw. I'll let you know how I like it. :) (Micah->Doug): Bonus! You will understand all of the German. Ha! :) (Doug->Micah): Augh. That's a blessing and a curse. I have to completely ignore the subtitles, and sometimes, the German is complete gibberish. (Doug->Micah): I finally gave up on subtitled anime. (Micah->Doug): Well...I mean...isn't it redundant for you, anyhow? (Doug->Micah): You'd be surprised how much early anime is unavailable /without/ subtitles. (Micah->Doug): WAITwaitwait. How strong is your power? Does Firefly Chinese make sense? Because...it's like its own language of horrifically mutilated Chinese... (Doug->Micah): Oh, Firefly is okay. It's like broken English. There's enough syntax that I can understand it, despite the jumble. (Doug->Micah): Ack. Phone's about to die. I'll call you later, okay? (Micah->Doug): Sure thing. Been good to hear from you. :) (Doug->Micah): Yeah. I've been a dick. Sorry about that. :( (Doug->Micah): Call you soon!