ArchivedLogs:Fanbirds

Fanbirds
Dramatis Personae Rasputin, Tony Stark	2014-01-14 '
Location <NYC> Central Park South
Central Park South is home not just to the park itself, but also to the Belvedere Castle, the Alice in Wonderland statues, and the Central Park Zoo. These areas tend to draw tourists like a magnet - it is, perhaps, for that very reason that places like Bethesda Terrace tend to attract more New Yorkers than not, if just to escape the press of tourism that infiltrates the whole city. The weather's not great. Grey and drizzly, a light but /steady/ fall of rain that's persisted all afternoon, chill and uncomfortable. It's driven many people indoors; this particular segment of park is barely populated. Which might be why Tony's /chosen/ it for a stroll, as incognito as he tends to get in jeans, an AC/DC t-shirt, a grey sweatshirt over that, a black waterproof jacket over /that/. Large dark glasses despite the grey day, a Red Bulls cap pulled down on his head. He has a pair of hot dogs in a cardboard container, currently in the process of devouring one as he makes his way back towards Midtown. Barely populated except for a flock of pigeons right near his path. Quickly, another pigeon flies down into the flock, joining the others, before spotting Tony. The pigeon squints it's eyes (as much as a pigeon can) before trotting over to Tony. Recognizing him, Rasputin looks up at him from below, starting with a squawk that turns into a voice. "OH MAN YOU'RE TONY STARK.". Rasputin's pigeon eyes are just /staring/ Tony down, in idol worship. "Why are you wearing gla- ooh you're incognito aren't you woops sorry for blowing your cover!". "What no I'm not," is Tony's immediate response to this. "I get that a lot, you have no idea how many women --" But here he pauses. Whirls around on a heel, turns back. His brows crease at seeing -- apparently nobody who could be talking to him. Turn. Turn turn turn, his frown deepening. "Oh God," he says to himself, starting to walk again, "now I'm hallucinating fans, Jarvis's never going to let me live that down." Walking up to Tony's shoe, Rasputin begins pecking it. "Woah, no, don't worry, I'm not a hallucination, I'm just a talking pigeon, no sweat.". As if this is much more sane. "Rasputin, one of your biggest fans in the Animal Kingdom. Maybe your only, I don't know, the other animals don't really talk about you much. They're losers.". Rasputin is gleefully looking up to Tony, obviously a /huge/ fan. "I'm down here, by the way.". Tony reflexively pulls his sneaker back from the petting, looking downward with much of his expression obscured by the sunglasses but his eyebrows deeply furrowing. "Talking pigeon. Right of course first zombies, now talking pigeon." He tears off a pinch of his hot dog bun, dropping it nearby the pigeon. "Maybe I've been drunk since Halloween." Rasputin begins eating the piece of bun, but this doesn't hinder talking at all. "Am I really that weird, seeing what our world is? Zombies, like you said, rainbow colored people, giant monsters, I think I'm like, the most normal of them all. Just a talking bird. Actually, usually a cat.". Rasputin finishes up the bread, looking up at Tony. "I don't think you can be constantly drunk that long I think, alcohol poisoning probably? Death? Or, coma, i don't know how alcohol works." "It's okay, I have --" Tony is baaacking away from the pigeon, slowly, though mostly because he's still looking around. Maybe for video cameras? Maybe he is getting PUNK'D. "-- a very sturdy liver. Very -- it gets. An /excellent/ workout, um, am I hearing this? Usually a cat. Why are you." He pinches off another piece of bun. Tosses it a just a /little/ bit farther away. "I don't make any products for pigeons. Do make a -- there's a water. Dispenser. For cats. I think our home goods --" Another tiny pinch of bun, tossed out a little bit farther than the last. "I actually used to have a music player. Hard to use in animal bodies, though. Very fun!". No video cameras, no PUNK'D crew, just a talking pigeon named Rasputin. Grabbing more and more bun, Rasputin tips a wing. "Well, I have to go. Nice to meet you, Mister Stark! You don't know how great this was for me!". In one last little thing, flying off, Tony's voice flies back at him. "Goodbye!". Just. Tony saying goodbye to Tony, basically. "All of ours take voice commands now --" Tony starts to answer before catching himself with the realization: "I'm talking to a pigeon. I'm talking to a pigeon in the park --" As Rasputing follows the little trail of buns, Tony's steps start to /speed/ in the other direction. "Goodbye. Right. A pigeon. Right." The disconcertion doesn't stop him from downing the rest of his first hot dog, still holding the second in its cardboard container as he hurries out of the park.